There are 5 steps to designing your ideal life. Do all the steps – for every area – and you’re pretty much guaranteed to land at your dream destination. Skip one step (or more), and you’ll almost surely end up frustrated and unfulfilled. In this installment, we’re going to look at steps 1-3…
- We need to ask ourselves WHO we’ve been in each area. This step requires deep contemplation and brutal honestly. For example, in the area of health (a stubborn area for me), my weight has tended to go up and down like an airplane. Sometimes I eat moderate portions of healthy foods. Other times you might catch me stuffing my face with pizza and cookies. I’ve been carrying an extra 20 pounds (or so) for the better part of two decades. This is certainly not who I’d chose to be – but in truth, it’s who I’ve been. Which leads to the next step…
- We need to be crystal clear about WHAT we want. On the surface, this sounds like it should be easy. Who doesn’t know what they want, right? But in reality, most of us are pretty fuzzy (and perhaps even clueless) about describing in precise detail what we’d most desire. Many of us tend to adopt the ‘standard’ list of wants – a million dollars, house by the beach, romance movie relationship, an Olympian body. But very few of us actually slow down enough to introspect about what we TRULY want, what would make us genuinely happy. Using myself as an example again in the area of health, I’ve done enough soul-searching to know I don’t really enjoy lifting weights. Having a fully-muscled, rock-hard body has never been particularly important to me. However, what IS important – I want to look and feel young, light, lean, energetic, and fully alive! So now I’ve got my authentic ‘gap’ to work with – the space between who I’ve been and what I want to be. But there’s one more critical step before we can move on to bridge that divide…
- We need to know our WHY. Why do we want what we want? This is a monumental question, because without a strong enough ‘why’, there’s very little chance we’ll maintain the perseverance necessary to reach the finish line. So in my example, it’s imperative I ask myself, “Why do I want to look and feel young, light, lean, energetic, and fully alive?” My answer: I want to be around for a long time, and I never want to see the inside of a hospital – unless it involves visiting someone – for as long as I live. (That’s a pretty strong why!) Also, looking and feeling this way would empower me, not only in the area of health, but in ALL areas of my life. When I’m eating healthier, I don’t feel tired and sluggish – which also positively affects my work and career – not to mention, the relationship I have with my wife, since I have more energy for meaningful connections. In short, my ‘why’ in the area of good health is because it will automatically make my whole quality of life function better!
In the next blog post, we’ll take a look at steps 4 and 5 – bridging the gap between who we’ve been, and who we want to be – in other words, creating a game plan, then working our plan.
Watch for Part 2 soon!
